It's Okay to Not Be Okay.
Positivity has its place, and focusing exclusively on negativity all the time is definitely not healthy either. But many forget that it is okay to not be okay. It's okay to experience "negative" emotions. It's okay to complain, worry, fear, get angry or sad, and fully process those emotions. Pushing away all emotions not 'positive' only leads to more stress, building up of pain and leads to emotional exhaustion, and explosive 'breakdowns' for most people - this is toxic positivity.
To be clear, I'm not saying that you should be negative all the time because focusing on positive doesn't matter - it does matter. I personally have to work on not letting my negative thoughts overwhelm me in tougher weeks because being able to see the positives does help you frame life to be better BUT taking time to allow yourself to feel those 'negative' emotions allows you to process them, validate yourself, work through any hang ups and THEN find the positives in the situation and move forward.
Positive thinking is very powerful. So is allowing yourself the safe space for those 'negative' moments and thoughts. Be sure to check in with yourself and make sure you are allowing yourself those moments, and growing from them.
If you struggle to balance positive thinking and allowing yourself time to process, please shoot me a message. I do too and would love to help lend a hand and offer any advice I've gotten myself from others who have worked through this, as well as therapists and books written about mental processing.
It's okay to not be okay.